Dancing With The Stars: Wk 6

Posted By: Bridget On: October 28, 2008 Comments: ( 5 )

By: Bridget




Exciting week, back to ballroom…ok maybe that is not so exciting.  There is a group dance, I’m sure it will annoy me.  Does anyone out there actually enjoy the group dances???  Tom Bergeron looks dapper as ever.  I don’t say enough about Tom, I’m usually too busy talking about Samantha Harris’ hideous dresses.  Tonight is no exception, who dresses her?  Whoever it is must dislike her, I can relate to that emotion.

The couples enter and Julianne Hough is all covered up like a Mormon…I guess that makes sense.  Maurice Greene looks handsome and Lacey Schwimmer looks silly in polka dots.  Kym Johnson’s silicone is out of control, seriously out of control.  Derek Hough seems annoyed to be standing there, maybe he will have an outburst tonight.  That always makes for good TV.  Cheryl Burke is wearing the ugliest pink floofy dress I have ever seen.

Michael Flatley is sitting in for Len Goodman tonight.  He’s gross.  Does this mean we are going to have to sit through some Riverdance BS this season?  I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Maurice Greene and Cheryl Burke are up first.  I hope this dance is worth her wearing that yucky dress.  They will do the Viennese Waltz.  In past seasons this has been a favorite of mine, but I’m thinking this crop of dancers are going to ruin it for me.  Not to beat a dead horse, but that dress makes Cheryl look like a big fat fatty.  The dance is pretty, Maurice is managing to stay in character.  It’s nice to see him leading.  This was good.  Let’s see what that nerd Flatley has to say, he said it could have been smoother and was sort of nice…I hate that.  Carrie complains about their chemistry.  Her dress is made of plastic, she should complain about that.  Bruno calls Maurice a surfer on dry land and said he needs to work on connecting.  Samantha stumbles through an interview and says Foxtrot in a hillbilly accent, what’s up with that?  Three 7’s and more babbling from Samantha.  She keeps sticking her tongue out tonight, that will rapidly begin to grind on my nerves.

Second to dance are Lance Bass and Lacey Schwimmer.  They actually show footage of them on a swing having a meaningful conversation, please.  Some N’Sync guys show up for support, not too busy these days are you guys?  Their dance is the Jive.  I love the Jive.  Fabulous.  Lance opened with a  cute solo and they kept it moving throughout.  Upbeat and sassy.  I love it!  Too bad grumpy old Len is not there to see it!  Tom Bergeron says, “I smell comeback”  I love Tom.  Bruno says Lance is back on target.  Flatley loved it.  Carrie whooped and hollered.

Oh jeez, I was right Flatley and his dancing dorks will be on tomorrow.  I’ll have to stock up on liquor.  Three 9’s, I think they deserved at least one 10.

Susan Lucci and Tony Dovolani are up third.  Tom Bergeron introduces him as Tony “no buttons” Dovolani.  I love Tom.  Ick, Cameron Mathison gets a little plug, puke.  It’s Mambo time for them.  I wonder if Tony can actually let one of these old ladies be wild.  This is not good kids.  Not good at all.  There is really nothing sultry to it at all.  Susan looks stiff and nervous, like she is trying too hard.  I am honestly wondering if Tony is part of the problem, I normally have nothing but love for him, but maybe his choreography skills are lacking.  Carrie loved it.  Bruno called them on the timing which was off, I agree with that completely.  Bruno and Carrie get in a little girl fight, love it.  Flatley yammers, he is terribly boring.  Two 8’s and a 7 from Bruno.  You have got to be kidding me.

Next to dance are Brooke Burke and Derek Hough.  Ms. Burke has some sort of foot injury.  Derek curses in rehearsal, that’s not very Mormon of him.  They are dancing the Rumba, I have no doubt that the injury will have zero affect on their performance.   I’m right, this is ummm…perfect.  They look like two professionals.  Flatley loved it, he talks an awful lot.  Carrie said that it was not her best dance and that her lines were awkward and the injury affected her.  Bruno also said she was under par.  I think the veteran judges are being hard on her.  Didn’t they just swoon over that craptastic dance of Lucci’s?  Two 8’s and a 10 from Flatley.  I hate to say it, but I agree with Flatley.

Cloris Leachman and Corky Ballas are doing the Cha Cha Cha next.  Do you think she is shocked that she is still in the competition?  The choreography starts out very cute, with Corky teaching Cloris the steps.  She looks a little bit lost, but it works with the feel of the dance.  Corky even gets in a little spinning lift.  I am impressed.  She’s in for another week Alyssa!!  Ha!  Bruno says she is the only person in the world able to sell such nonsense, to this Cloris works the crowd-it’s great.  Flatley compliments Corky, it’s nice.  Carrie lays down some smack about losing Toni Braxton for this dance.  It’s official I hate Carrie Ann Inaba.  Almost as much as I hate Toni Braxton.  Does everyone else think Carrie is huge B-Yatch???  Three 5’s.  They are trying to get rid of her, that’s just mean.  Vote kids, let’s keep her in just to show the judges that their negative ass-y behavior will not work.

Cody Linley and Julianne Hough are doing the Samba next.  They show Cody without a shirt on, that’s not good, not good at all.  I don’t know if it was the repetitiveness of the music or what, but this did not really do much for me.  Boring.  Carrie called it the most intense Samba she had ever seen.  What?  Bruno thought he got it completely wrong.  That’s more like it Bruno.  He and Carrie fight some more, Bruno wins because as I mentioned I hate Carrie.  Flatley said a bunch of hish that really did not mean anything.  Julianne Hough said she has endometriosis and has to have her appendix removed tomorrow.  That does not make sense at all, look it up.  Edyta Sliwinska will fill in for her while she recovers, that should be interesting.  Two 8’s and a 7 from Bruno.

Last to dance are Warren Sapp and Kym Johnson doing the Rumba.  Kym’s not so much wearing clothes this week.  I liked Brooke and Derek’s Rumba and this is ten times better.  Really, it is great.  Warren Sapp is hardly scaring me at all tonight.  Flatley called it entertaining but said he would have liked to see more dancing.  Carrie called it sexy and gets accused by Tom of flirting with Warren.  I bet she is, don’t do it Warren, odds are she is high maintenance!  Bruno also loved his character but called him out on footwork issues.  Two 8’s and a 9 from Flatley.

Group dance time.  Old school hip hop…really?  Pause.  I need more vino.  The stars take turns embarrassing themselves at rehearsal.  The dance happens,  that’s five minutes of my life I’ll never get back.

Lance Bass and Lacey Schwimmer were my favorite.  My pick for the worst was Susan Lucci and Tony Dovolani.  I think they’ll wind up on the chopping block again.